Have you ever noticed that it's really challenging to put words to whatever you're feeling at the moment? We default to the major feeling words like happy, joyful, sad, disappointed, angry, etc. And though those words are helpful to know, it's actually really valuable to go a bit deeper and "locate" more nuance and specificity in what we're feeling.
My wife Shasta and I, in order to increase our emotional vocabulary, have been using this picture tool (see below) in our conversations with each other during the day. The list is broken down into four quadrants: Low Pleasantness to High Pleasantness, and Low Energy to High Energy. It's been challenging at times b/c we're not in the habit of being so specific with our emotion words. But it's been fun & frustrating and definitely empowering.
Being able to identify our specific feeling is at the core of emotional intelligence which measures our self awareness and social awareness. Words do matter.
If you’re a leader, the more you have a nuanced and accurate emotional vocabulary, the more you will be understood and the more the people around you will be feel understood. And you will be offering a transformational example of what working and living as a full human being is about.
This tool comes from Dr. Marc Brackett's book "Permission to Feel." He's the Director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and a professor at the Child Study Center. Outstanding book!!
from Marc Brackett, “Permission to Feel”
